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Ann Marie and John: Parents of Christopher who died as a young adult.

ANN MARIE: My other brother that was haemophiliac, he died two years ago. He never had HIV and he never had hepatitis C either. And at the end of the day even though he never got the virus, he still died.
JOHN: Jim had a long history of, not alcohol but drugs. Some to blank out the fact that he, a survivor syndrome, he didn't get HIV, yet so many people he knew got it, and, he was a severe haemophiliac who needed constant treatment. So he could never understand why he wasn't infected the same as everyone else, considering the amount of factor VIII he got. Then he was having a lot of pain, so he was taking drugs for the pain, and eventually the drugs for the pain hooked him, morphine. So he was quite heavily on drugs. Although I think for the last few years of his life he was clean with drugs. But he felt terribly guilty about other people, his brother. I think he knew about Christopher, I'm pretty certain he did. And the other people he'd grown up with as haemophiliacs, that they were all dead or dying, and he was surviving.

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Ann Marie and John: Parents of Christopher who died as a young adult.

It wasn't just husbands that died. I mean take a child away, and there were lots of children died, it took away big chunks of parents' lives, but nobody talks about the parents. Took away big chunks of brothers' lives, because that's still a big thing to him. Took away grandchildren that I could have had. Took away a daughter-in-law. Took away all sorts of things. But the trust never think about that. They only think about mothers. Children, when they lose a parent, don't tend to get on with their lives. Parents can never get on with their lives when they lose a son or a daughter.

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David and Sue: Parents of Robert, who is living with haemophilia and HIV.

DAVID: Yes, Sue was Chair of Somerset AIDS - and as I said, I think she was upset about looking after people who were dying in the same way that Bob was going to die. This did upset her a bit, a lot. I think it was a situation which I didn't understand at all. I felt very guilty about it because people had said of us, 'Gosh, they'll never divorce, they've always been together'. So I felt guilty, that it must be my fault.

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Edna: Mother of Robert.

In the mid-nineties, I had this health scare. I was convinced that I was probably going to die, and I thought, 'I can't die. Who's going to look after Robert?' Dreadfully enough, I think ashamed of it now, but I even thought, if anything dreadful is going to happen to Robert, I hope it happens when I'm still alive so I can look after him, because I couldn't bear to think that I wouldn't be here to look after him.

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Jan and Mel: Parents of Luke who died as a young adult.

JAN: I think we were very close. I probably mothered him, maybe, a bit too much, but never in public. Used to give him lots of cuddles, even when he was six foot tall. I used to say, 'Oh give me a cuddle!' And I used to ask him if he was okay and did he want to talk about anything and he used to say, 'No, I'm fine'. And I used to say, 'How are you coping? Because I'm not coping very well'. He says, 'I know, so I'll give you cuddles, Mum!'

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Jan and Mel: Parents of Luke who died as a young adult.

JAN: Neal accepted we did do more things with Luke than we did with him.
MEL: But that didn't mean that he was excluded.
JAN: No. It's only latterly, he's told us more and more and I think we're realising probably how it has affected him, probably more than we realised. However much we tried to include Neal, I would imagine he did feel excluded at times, but that certainly wasn't deliberate on our part. We tried to bring them up the same, but obviously we couldn't because of what was wrong with Luke.

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Janet: Mother of Stuart.

In law they were allowed to have motability at sixteen. And so it is very difficult when your child of sixteen not only takes their whole medical history upon their own shoulders, but gets in the car and takes themself off to hospital as well. You become redundant at a very early age. The boys matured or, I suppose, were forced to mature very early and take responsibility. So I suppose it was what I'd always wanted for him to be self-sufficient. So it was good, but you do feel odd when you're not part of it any more.

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Laura: Sister of Stuart who died as a young adult.

So it is nice for me to have a husband, and even my husband's best friend, and a lot of my friends that were very close friends with my brother as well. So that side of him's not going to be forgotten in our circle. He met my daughter, but he isn't going to meet this child, this child I'm carrying. I'm glad he got to meet Charlotte. She was six months old when he died, but we're getting to that point where people are coming in to my life that didn't know him. Charlotte obviously won't remember him. Mum's doing a memory book, so that things can go in there that will help me, help Charlotte and my future child know who he was.

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Mary S: Mother of Colin, who died as an adult.

I always felt guilty at giving Colin haemophilia. I shall always feel guilty about that, I shall never feel happy about it, because he would've been such a good lad. I spoilt his life, didn't I? And then again, I wouldn't have liked to have been without him, but I'm so sorry that I gave him that horrible gene. My Bob knew what I felt like.

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Molly: Mother of Oliver who died as a young adult.

We became very, very close, extremely close, Oliver and I. We had a wonderful relationship and everybody knew it. Everybody knew that Oliver and Mum, Oliver wasn't Mum's boy, there was no way was he a mummy's boy, but we just had something very, very special. He was very special. And I think, just to hear his voice and to see him made me happy and to know that he was all right.

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Norma: Mother of Catherine, Caroline, John and James. John and James died as young adults.

We had home treatment. And that is the most appalling bit of this saga, is that, I was injecting him with infected blood. Guilt is a big thing. Also I gave them the disease, I was a carrier. So, yes, guilt is a very heavy load I think.